Hey guys, it's your favorite social network here (you know who we are). We're so excited to tell you about our latest update! We've added even more ads to your timeline! Woohoo!

But that's not all, we've also made it impossible to see posts from your friends unless you like and comment on every single one. And don't forget to share those political articles that we show you, even if you have no idea what they're talking about.

Oh, and did we mention the new feature where we collect all of your personal information and sell it to third-party companies? Yeah, we know you love